Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Time? What Is That?

So, I have a real problem with time management. I've said this in the past, but it is something I really need to buckle down on. Especially now. At this juncture in my life, I am seriously strapped for time. I tried volunteering at the local animal rescue here in town, and have never been able to make it back. I feel really bad about that. Those are some good people that work over there, and they do good things. However, my mornings are taken up with tutoring, and my afternoons are taken up with work and tending to my wife's needs. I love her more than anything, but the truth of the matter is she has issues that require me to give her more attention than most people require of their significant others. This isn't a complaint or me trying to cast a negative light on my wife, merely a fact. We all have issues. Hers just happen to take up more of my time than most. Weekends tend to be full with plans to see family and other things that didn't get taken care of during the week. Then, there are days like this one. My wife is gone at the moment, and I actually have time to do something this evening. These times are so rare, however, I end up wasting them watching videos on the Internet because I don't get to do that any other time. Of course, this time, I actually managed to make myself do something I should be doing a lot more often. Namely, this post. As my wife will be busier with a project of her own for the next month or so, hopefully this will become a more regular thing. At least until that project is over.

Of course, the more I think about all of this, the more I think it's just an excuse. I mean, my cousin has a job where he works a ton of hours, still has a family he cares for (a real family, not a wife and assorted animals like I do), and still finds the time to do regular blog posts. This post in particular was quite interesting and inspired, and was done only a few days ago. And he's already posted twice since then.

I have so many things I want to do, and I haven't done any of them. I've never been good at forcing myself to do things, so things that are hard or take work, no matter how much fun they may be, get pushed aside in favor of watching the Game Overthinker, or some other such show. I shouldn't be watching MovieBob. I should BE MovieBob (in a metaphorical way, not a creepy stalker way). I am intelligent, creative, and have access to the resources required to do something cool and awesome. I should be doing something cool and awesome. I am just missing that all important piece of knowledge and/or drive that allows me to force myself to actually work on a project instead taking the easy way out and Facebooking for an hour before switching to YouTube. I've tried setting aside a certain time to work on stuff, but can't make myself stick to it.

So, I don't know. Is it really that I don't have enough time? Or am I just too lazy? Or is it some combination thereof? I used to have a lot more time, and still didn't do anything with it, so my vote is on the middle one.

I'll find a way to overcome this. I have to. I can't have lived my life without doing something cool when I have in front of me all that I need to do it. I will not accept that fate. I will find a way.

Oh, and sorry for this particular post. It has nothing to do with anything this blog is supposed to be about, but I needed the outlet.